Do you have enough sex? 0 78895

I’d bet you don’t normally take relationship advice from a total stranger, but since you are here, let’s dive right into it. Do you have enough sex?

That’s the multi-million-dollar question, isn’t it? How much sex is considered normal? And how much is too little? While the answer to your question will vary depending on who you ask, I’m going to play doctor and survey expert and tell you what doctors, and people in general, consider too much or too little sex.

As long as you and your partner or partners are comfortable, there is no such thing as too much sex. Comfortable being the key word here.

So, what qualifies as comfortable?

During sex, comfortable translates to the absence of pain. When you feel comfortable, and not sore or raw “down there,” then you aren’t having too much sex. If that changes, and you become uncomfortable, sore, or raw, then you should probably give your private bits a couple of days off. As a lady, when there is too much penetration or discharge of fluids, the vagina can get really dry, and without proper lubrication, vaginal tearing is definitely going to happen. This can lead to a lot of nasty things, and you might end up needing to see your gynecologist.

Men are not left out of this equation either. When a man ejaculates more than ten times in three days, he can experience some pain “down there” for a while. He might have trouble getting an erection, but after two or three incidents, he should be able to adapt to the demands of his sex schedule.

Some not so clear answers

Now that we’ve covered that area, let’s tackle the burning question on everyone’s mind. Do you have enough sex? Truthfully, there isn’t a straightforward answer to this question. As I said, it depends on who you ask. A doctor might tell you that as long as you are sexually active once in a while, then you are okay. Younger and more sexually active people will probably give you an excessive number that you can not possibly compete with.

Getting your own answers

Do you have enough sex?

The only person who can really answer that question is you. In my experience, most people inflate the number of sexual encounters they have on an average. Sure, they might have loads of sex, but they will definitely add a body or two just to be sure that you don’t have a higher count than they do. I know this because I do it, and so do some of my friends. Bottom line is, you cannot take anything anybody says about sexual encounters at face value. They tend to exaggerate, and their numbers are not reliable or realistic.

In my experience, the real answer to this question lies with you. Without external influence, of course, if you feel utterly satisfied with your sexual life, then you have enough sex. If you have sex, say once per week, and you are ecstatic, then you are all good.

You can have more if your partner still needs to have some more sex, but don’t take your lack of desire as an indication of a weak sexual drive. We are different people inherently, and as such, we all have different sexual drives and requirements and honestly, if you aren’t enthusiastic about having sex, then you shouldn’t force yourself to have more.

Forcing yourself to have more sex when you are really uninterested can have the opposite effect on your sexual drive. It might end up seeming like more of a chore and less of a ceremony of pleasure.

Although I stand by what I said, real life is often far more complicated than all the words and theories out there. We know very well that sexuality is fluid, and so is the desire to have sex too. Sometimes we are very indifferent towards sex, and other times we want to keep going till the sun comes up. Regardless of how you feel, the same rule applies: If you are having sex and you want to have more, then you probably need to have more – but not till you cause a vaginal tear or something. However, if you go at it a few times and you are all filled up then call it a night and don’t keep going just because it’s what is expected of you.

In summary, regardless of how wild you are, as long as you are happy and satisfied, then you are in the clear. You are the only one that can really determine if you have enough sex. Any external yardstick is just putting you in a corner and is not really helping you.

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Practice self-sacrifice: Things we can learn from Lent 0 10837

Lent, to be perfectly clear is a Christian practice. Although, anyone is welcome to try the tradition in honor of sacrifice. Lent is a tradition that involves fasting for forty days and nights in preparation for Easter. It begins on Ash Wednesday and ends with the Easter celebration.

I remember growing up in the Catholic church, my parents really took Lent seriously and they passed that will onto me. They would leave their ashes on for the entire day just to prove that they were serious about penance. Lent or Lenten-fasting is a Christian practice that involves depriving oneself of the things that are dear to him or her. It’s kind of a symbol to represent the kind of suffering that Christ endured in the wilderness. Although Lent is not for everyone, depriving oneself of some form of comfort is a good thing. Lent doesn’t just involve waiting for the sweets or food that Easter comes with; it requires depriving yourself of something that you are basically addicted to; something that takes some priority in your daily life; that is why it’s so symbolic.

Here are a few things that people typically deprives themselves of for a short while.

Focusing on your needs and not your wants

When I say this, I mean you should chin up and stop buying all the things that you want but don’t really need. Things like new phones and devices shouldn’t be your priority, not when you don’t really need them. This Lent you should try saving some extra money for a change, you might end up saving more money than you think. This little practice should span across everything you spend money on. For example, you can’t buy all the little things you set your sight on this Lenten fast.

Donating every day of the Lenten fast

Regardless of whether you are religious or not, giving should hold a special place in your life. We are blessed to be where we find ourselves today and should never forget those that aren’t as fortunate. This Lent, try to give as much as you can daily. It might be just a plate of soup or some old clothes, but it might be enough to put a smile on a person’s face.

 Gossiping

I know that most gossips don’t think they gossip. They just see their conversations as innocent gist sessions. It takes a lot of courage to admit that you are a gossip but a sure tell sign would be the feeling that what you are doing and saying might hurt someone. This Lent we should try to fight those habits that seem hurtful to others. After all, Lent is about repentance and penance, we should see the days of the lent fast as an intense confession and repentance session and try to break away from old destructive habits.

Limiting meal time to just three times a day

I think more than anything, Lent is about the tribulations that Jesus faced and overcame in the desert. So, its only appropriate that we too subject ourselves to similar conditions. Technically, limiting meal time to the standard three times a day doesn’t really compare to the kind of suffering that he endured in the wilderness, but I think that it’s a safe compromise. We should try to get closer to the savior this Easter by devoting more time to knowing him and curbing our eating habits. This meal limiting plan should cover just more than the conventional meal. It should also go in to cover other things like limiting your soda intake and junk food consumption.

Give up TV

This might seem impossible for some with unbelievable line-up of coming this spring. People easily forget that these great series will still be there a month after Easter. Television is inherently distracting. It’s practically impossible to stay focused on the Messiah when you are shacked up in front of the TV every night. This lent, you should try to disconnect from it all. Try minimizing your TV time and pick up something that is less distracting and more productive like prayer.

Pray this Lent

One of the major characteristics of a fast is constant prayer, this Lenten shouldn’t be any different. Try to devote some time to praying to him every day – it’s the most important part of the fast. You should put all that excess time from not watching TV to good use and try to really commune with him.

Here are a few things that we can change about ourselves this Lent that could help us improve our relationship. Lent, above everything else is about Jesus Christ. This little suggestion list allows us to effectively share in his experience and strengthen our relationship.

Getting your kids to read this summer 839 150637

Summer means different things for different people. For twenty-year-old’s, it’s the time to work and party; for parents, it’s the time to hold neighborhood events and start saving up, and for kids, it’s the time to kick back and finally have some fun. School’s out! 😃 It’s that one time of the year when they can go to the beach and hang out with all their friends without worrying about some project or homework. For them, the entire summer is all about having fun, and as a parent, it’s your sacred duty to balance fun with continuing education. You might even be able to replace “fun” with something more rewarding – like reading!

Knowledge attained outside the classroom tends to stick around longer

You don’t want to be the “uncool” parent that forces your kid to do something school-related during the summer, but you don’t really have that much of choice, here’s why. The lessons that really stick with you long after you finish school are the ones that you learned when you didn’t really have to.

The knowledge that is acquired without some form of ultimatum or consequence always leaves a lasting impression. It also introduces you to a new side of knowledge that is not purely scholarly.

Reading is right for you regardless of what it is that you decide to read – obviously you will have to control your kids’ intake in your spare time. Reading strengthens the mind, and continual learning increases the speed at which you assimilate and process information. Just imagine the kind of impact a fantastic reading speed could have on your kid educational future. You could be adequately preparing them for a future in academia.

Exposure

The reward of “ruining” their obsessively fun summer will be some exposure to other subjects and topics that are unfamiliar to them. Recreational reading could be very instrumental in building up their overall personality. Plus, proper exposure ensures that they have enough information to make smarter and more informed decisions at a tender age.

It can teach them to research and ask questions

Summer reading could form the basis of a voracious reading habit that could beautifully complement their curiosity. It’s not every kid that thinks about something strange that eventually go on to investigate, summer reading could introduce them to the concept of research.

How to get your kids to read during the summer

It’s easy to talk about getting your kids to read during the summer, getting them to do it another issue entirely.

Kids can be especially stubborn or pigheaded when you are trying to force them to do what they simply have no interest in. The only way to have them do what you want the right way is to either introduce a reward system or trick them that it’s all their idea. Local library’s often offer summer reading lists per age group.

Reward system

Are you having a hard time getting your kid to do anything you want? Wait patiently, there is always something they’ll want, and you can use that to get what you want – in this case, it’s a healthy reading habit.

When they come to you with a ridiculous demand, you can propose a fair trade that will engage their mind and keep it focused on a book that you’ll recommend. You can even choose to deliver the reward after the completion of several books, that way, you are getting the most out of your deal.

You can also choose to limit or restrict play time, and the completion of a certain number of pages could be the requirement they must fulfill before they are allowed to play again.

Making them think it’s their idea

In my experience, people are always more motivated to complete a project that they believe to be totally theirs. When it’s your plan, you just tend to pay more attention to it, it’s like you want to prove something to yourself and others around you. Adults think this way, and so do kids. They can be pretty devoted to completing a book they just accidentally stumbled upon or saw you flip through.

Sometimes you don’t have to be so obvious or aggressive, you could give a rousing speech about reading and hand them a book that you know that they’ll enjoy and leave the rest to them.

The summertime doesn’t have to all about vacations and parties, it could also be an opportunity for your kid to develop a reasonably analytical mind.

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